The 3 Things I Got So Wrong Pre-IVF (and What I’d Do Instead)

I’ve been through 9 IVF cycles.

That’s not a typo. Nine.

So when I say I know the rollercoaster you’re on, I don’t mean it in a “oh hun, I read about IVF once” kind of way. I mean I’ve lived it. The bloating, the blood tests, the hope, the heartbreak, the obsessive Googling at 2am. I’ve been exactly where you are.

If I could go back to the beginning and do things differently? There are three key things I’d focus on. Things I totally overlooked back then, but now know are foundational.

Now, I’m not saying these are the only things you need to do (we both know IVF is a full-body, full-life situation), but these are the three I didn’t give enough attention to back then... and they would’ve made a huge difference.

1. Regulating My Nervous System + Prioritizing Sleep

Back when I started trying to conceive, I had a high-pressure job at Deloitte. Think spreadsheets, long hours, and stress levels that could make a cortisol molecule flinch.

So naturally, I decided to reduce stress by getting a new job. I became … the Chief Financial Officer at Australia Zoo. (No, really. That was my solution. Spoiler alert: not less stressful)

Here’s what I didn’t understand then: stress doesn’t just go away. Infertility and IVF doesn’t pause your life. It adds to the chaos.

What I needed wasn’t a new job. It was new tools—to help my body actually handle what I was putting it through.

That’s what regulating your nervous system is.

It’s about calming the fight-or-flight response (which, let’s be honest, is running on overdrive during IVF) and showing your body that you’re safe.

When your nervous system is dysregulated (think anxious thoughts, shallow breathing, trouble sleeping) your body doesn’t prioritize reproduction. It prioritizes survival.

If I had my time again, I’d do things like:

• Legs up the wall before bed (yes, it looks ridiculous, but it’s magic for calming your system)
• Breathwork – 4 counts in, 4 counts hold, 4 counts out. Repeat until you stop plotting the nurse's death for running late (again).
• Cold water therapy (hello, vagus nerve stimulation!)
• Gentle yoga or somatic movement
• Daily walks in nature, without a podcast blaring in your ears

It’s not about becoming zen or perfect. It’s about giving your body a fighting chance to actually do what you’re asking it to do. And sleep? Sleep is where your body does its best healing and hormone regulation. It's not optional, it’s the foundation.

2. Going Low-Tox (Not No-Tox)

Fifteen years ago, I’d never heard of endocrine-disrupting chemicals. I had no idea that what I was putting on my skin, spraying on my benches, or storing my leftovers in could actually be messing with my hormones.

Now? I know better.

Endocrine-disrupting chemicals (EDCs) are found in plastics, fragrances, cosmetics, cleaning products, and they interfere with your hormone system. And let’s be honest, if you're going through IVF, your hormones are already doing enough. They don’t need chemical sabotage.

These little disruptors can:

• Mimic estrogen
• Mess with ovulation
• Affect egg quality
• Disrupt implantation

So yeah… not ideal.

But here's the kicker... it’s not about eliminating all toxins (unless you're planning to live in a treehouse and drink rainwater for the rest of your life). It’s about lowering the load. Low-tox, not no-tox.

Easy swaps I wish I’d made:

• Drink from glass or stainless steel - ditch the plastic drink bottles
• Store and reheat food in glass containers
• Switch to fragrance-free or natural skincare
• Use low-tox cleaning products (even vinegar and water gets the job done)
• Choose non-toxic nail polish (yes, it exists!)

It doesn’t have to be all at once. One swap at a time.

Because the tiny things we’re exposed to every day? They add up. And if there’s something simple I can do to reduce that load, without spiraling into obsession, I’d do it.

3. Ditching the All-or-Nothing Approach

This one? Oof. It still stings a bit.

When I was deep in IVF mode, I was obsessed with doing everything right. And if I couldn’t do it perfectly? I’d scrap it all.

We were trying to figure out how to thicken my lining and regulate my cycle, and one day we drove past a homeopathic clinic that had a sign in the window:

"Pregnant within 6 months or your money back."

My Type A brain said, “Challenge accepted.”

We signed up. Six months later, we got our money back. I weirdly felt victorious, like “HA! I beat your system!” Except I still wasn’t pregnant.

I was on a candida diet from that practitioner, but then I found research saying the Mediterranean diet was better for fertility. So I was combining both (read: doing neither well). I was chugging teas, popping supplements from three different “experts,” and trying everything I’d read on some late-night fertility forum.

It was chaotic. And exhausting. And honestly, it wasn’t helping.

If I had my time again? I’d simplify. I’d stop trying to do everything, and start doing the right things... consistently.

I’d build from the ground up:

• Nourishing food
• Movement that makes you feel good
• Real rest
• A solid supplement plan (not 47 random pills)
• Structure and routine

And most importantly, I’d stop beating myself up when I slipped. I’d aim for progress, not perfection. I’d centre it around kindness, not punishment.

Because I wasn’t lazy. I wasn’t lacking willpower. I was just overloaded. Scattered. Desperate to do everything right, but too overwhelmed to know what that looked like.

And That’s Why I Created The Playbook

The IVF Playbook is the free guide I wish I’d had when I was prepping for my first (or fifth) cycle.

It cuts through the noise.
It gives you clarity.
It helps you feel like, “Okay, this is what matters.”

Inside, I break it down into 5 key areas: food, supplements, movement, sleep, and low-tox living, and show you how to actually apply them to your life. Like, real life. Not the Pinterest version.

You’ll also get bonus tips for things like those 3am wakeups, quitting caffeine without rage-quitting life, and how to prep without losing your mind.

And it’s free. Because IVF is expensive enough.

👉[Download The IVF Playbook here]

Need Help Sticking to It All?

When you download The Playbook, you’ll also get a special discount on my masterclass: The Consistency Code.

Because if you’ve ever:

• Started strong… then crashed when life got busy
• Tried to do everything right, and then spiraled when you couldn’t
• Felt like you were failing at IVF before it even began...

This is for you.

👉The Consistency Code will show you how to:
✓ Ditch the burnout perfectionism
✓ Create real structure that feels human
✓ Build habits that stick—even when life does its worst
✓ Prep for IVF without losing yourself

You don’t have to do this alone. And you don’t have to do it perfectly. You just have to start.